A note to people who know who I am

So I've come across a bit of a dilemma in what to include in my blog, and what to leave out. You see, my blog serves a couple of purposes, but mostly, its a place for me to talk and let my thoughts out when I don't feel I can in real life, and maybe, if one of these days someone comments on my blog, get a wider perspective on issues. Though, at the moment, it doesn't seem like anyone is taking enough interest in my writing to comment, so mostly this blog is currently just for me.
Recently I've noticed more views from the UK. Sure enough, they're spread amongst views from Russia, the USA, and very occasional views from Canada and some European countries.
But I became aware that people I know could just as easily come across my blog.
I guess I don't know what to think of that. My blog does have stuff I don't really want to be popular knowledge amongst some of the people I know - mostly my fellow OCdts at the OTC, as they most kindly proved yet again at last nights dinner. Those few of you that have been keeping up with my posts will likely have realised that I have a tendency to skip over certain things: The other non-NaNo-related reasons for my mid-November breakdown (I know I told you it wasn't a breakdown, but that wasn't exactly true); the reasons I changed over the summer and I can't go back to picking up guys on nights out; the reasons I find any feelings of love so hard and painful; the reasons I don't mention my name in my blog. Its because its stuff that is very difficult for me to talk about to people around me. Putting it on my blog would lift a huge weight off my chest, but I don't particularly want it known by certain people around me. Even my parents don't know some of this stuff, and there's a lot of it that only my closest friends know.
It wouldn't be too hard for some of the people who know me to find out that the blog belonged to me, and find out all these secrets were I to post them. Between the LHC, the stuff I post here, and NaNo, I could guess it really wouldn't be too hard to figure out. But yet, I still want to talk freely here. I may not want my family, and fellow OTC-ers to know those things, but in reality, it probably wouldn't make much difference to my life if they did.
This blog is, in a way, like a public diary for me. Posting the stuff I'm thinking about takes a lot of weight off my chest - even if it's just me writing a whole pile of stuff thats in my head, and editing out all the personal stuff later, it still helps.
Its been suggested to me to keep a diary before, because I was having such a rough time of it emotionally, just as I am now. Thats why I actually started this blog up again, after it lying dormant for so long. I need it to keep me going sometimes, even if it doesn't seem like it. I guess if I can't let everything out, whats the point? I've decided that while I'll keep my blogger name rather than my own, for the sake of my sanity and the point of the blog, but I won't hold in these things any longer. I will no longer lie, or gloss over the major stuff in an effort not to to have my identity discovered.
I am Tigereye, blogger, LHC-er, musician, and student. My biggest vanity is my hair, and my biggest comfort, my close friends and family. My last boyfriend died in a fire. My uncle died of suicide. In November, a boy I went to high school with died of suicide. I was saddened by it, though I only knew him from class, and it brought back all the old grief. I was deeply affected and horrified at the news of the connecticut shootings, and found all the accusations and debate expressly painful to listen to. I changed a lot over the summer, on the anniversary of the death of my last boyfriend, which happened to fall while the band were in Basel. I can no longer deal with the shame and guilt I feel over all the times I had got caught up with other guys I barely knew. It was a way for me to deal with loss, but it didn't work. I find love hard and painful because, for me, it is so fundamentally connected to death. But as much as it hurts, I want nothing more than for someone to care, someone to hug on the bad days and a shoulder to cry on. Someone to stick up for me when rumours go around, instead of trying to stumble on by myself through life and defend myself, when I know it will only make me look more guilty in the eyes of those accusing. I am not as strong as people give me credit for. I am like every other girl out there, carrying secrets and hurt. But like every other girl, I also carry hope, friendship and love. My family get on, and I love every one of them. I couldn't survive without my brother, my sister, and my friends. I have people I can trust and love. I am lucky to be the person I am, and have what I have.
I am Tigereye, and this is my blog. These are my hopes, my fears, my dark secrets. If you think you know who I really am, come and ask me and I will answer truthfully, if you will do but one thing in return. I ask that you keep these secrets. That they remain between me and my readers. For that you will have my unending gratitude.
For the rest of you out there, as you were. And thank you (Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!) for following my blog. :)